(with apologies to Ogden Nash)
Hi, everyone! And welcome to the weekend edition of Write-Up For Yesterday, BttP’s guide to what the heck happened yesterday in baseball. We’re not gonna just hand you some scores here, because we trust you know how to type the letters E-S-P-N into your internet machine. Instead, we hope to give you a fuller and richer understanding of important goings on from yesterday in baseball. The big stories, and the noteworthy performances-good and bad.
Welcome back from the first full weekend of the baseball season, everybody! Did you miss finding out that your team’s best player is taking the day off on Sunday as much as I did?
STORY LINES AND NEWS CYCLE EPHEMERA
Goodness, did you guys see the 19 inning Red Sox-Yankees game Friday night? It got to the point where I was less interested in the game and more interested in whether or not Bob Costas was going to have a nervous breakdown on air. If that thing went one more inning he probably would have started reading from his dream journal (Monday: the one where I’m tall. Tuesday: the one where I’m tall. Wednesday: Herb Brooks and I eat pancakes in a respectful silence. Thursday: the one where I’m tall). Anyway, some folks are calling the game an instant classic, other folks are calling it unwatchable. For me, absurdly long baseball games are not good or bad, they’re just absurd, and I love them for it. The Sox took the series, but last night Clay Buchholz gave up nine earned runs in 3.1 innings.
Miguel Cabrera hit two home runs yesterday to help the Tigers remain one of two undefeated teams in MLB. Could Miguel Cabrera be good? My column:
The other undefeated team? The Royals! I will not attempt to explain this.
The Twins are still bad.
The Reds seemed like quite the hot team, before starting a series with St. Louis. They lost the series to the Big Effectively Monotonous Machine of the Cardinals. If the Cardinals were a professional wrestler, his name would be like “Jeff the Wrestler”, and he would wear sensible shoes in the ring, and his story lines would revolve around him choosing between the standard or itemized deduction. He would never lose.
The Marlins have gotten off to a rough 1-5 start, and Giancarlo Stanton has no home runs and only one extra base hit. But it’s cool, Mat Latos is going tonight! Against the Braves! What could go wrong?
Quick ace check-in:
-Clayton Kershaw got roughed up in Arizona, and he currently has a 5.84 ERA. Although we all remember what happened after the last time he got roughed up against the Diamondbacks.
-Felix Hernandez left his start yesterday with tightness in his quad, which is different from tightness on the Quad. The latter usually involves a Hacky Sack.
The Cubs took a series from the Rockies at Coors, thanks to a 9th inning go-ahead home run from former Rockie Dexter Fowler. I don’t really want to talk about it.
ARTICLES WE LIKED
Ryan Sullivan scouted Jayson Werth as he progresses through rehab with Potomac.
The BP team took a look at some breakout candidates for this year.
Our own Brandon Lee talked to author Susan Petrone about her novel Throw Like A Woman.
TWEETS WE LIKED
Bartolo Colon got his first RBI since 2005 and IT WAS EVERYTHING: http://t.co/ez7qXv3Y6J pic.twitter.com/fC0JjFHVO7
— MLB (@MLB) April 12, 2015
Don’t let the stat geeks convince you defense is of secondary importance.
— Adam Rubin (@AdamRubinESPN) April 12, 2015
George Springer robs Rangers of walk-off grand slam with amazing catch http://t.co/U4T6FHOjXo
— Big League Stew (@bigleaguestew) April 13, 2015
Zero feel (via @matthiasellis) pic.twitter.com/9TWqi34JuK
— Ben Badler (@BenBadler) April 11, 2015
TODAY’S THREE BEST PITCHING MATCHUPS
Aaron Harang (PHI) vs. Jacob DeGrom (NYM)
Harang was brilliant against the Red Sox in his first start, striking out eight. Wouldn’t it be hilarious if Aaron Harang was really good this year? Like, I would literally have no other reaction to it but thinking it’s hilarious.
Anibal Sanchez (DET) vs. Gerrit Cole (PIT)
Two underrated pitchers start off an interleague series that should be a lot of fun.
Jordan Zimmermann (WAS) vs. Rick Porcello (BOS)
It’s so unfair that Porcello has to start off his Red Sox career against the great Jordan Zimmermann and Aaron Harang (see? Isn’t it fun?)
Next post: After Facing The Dark Knight, Is the Joke(r) on Strasburg?
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Ken Maeda
Wrestler names have gotten less colorful and more mundane over the years. Maybe not quite “Jeff,” but it’s getting there. And, back in the early 90s, there was a character named Irwin R Shyster: IRS. His outfit was slacks and a dress shirt. His finishing move was “The Write-off.”